Your ovaries stop working, your estrogen levels drop, and hot flashes, mood changes, sleep problems, a drop in libido, and skin and mucosa dryness appear. You have spent your life complaining about your period. Are you going to miss it when it is finally gone? No way. Let us break the taboo as we have already done with the previous ones - with information and knowledge. What are the symptoms of menopause? Can they be prevented? Does sex drive declines?
The society, the cinema, the literature... Everything has conspired to sell us a concrete image. A woman who does no longer have her periods, suddenly becomes either an adorable old lady that takes care of her plants and bake cakes for her grandchildren, or a crazy cat lady. There seems to be only two options. We are not saying that they are not great, but they do not look like the height of joy. Ok, you can take care of your flowers, of your grandson or of your neighbour’s grandson, but you can also (even on the same day) go skydiving, write a thesis or dress up like a dominatrix. The period does not determine who you are. Please, it seems incredible that we have to explain such a thing.
The ovarian activity ceases, but not the sexual activity
Menopause causes different physical and psychological symptoms in every woman. Although hot flashes, a tendency to melancholy and a decrease in natural lubrication are due to hormonal changes, not all women experience them in the same way and with the same intensity.
The first thing to do after noticing the early signs is see a gynaecologist. And the second thing is to know clearly that a woman’s sex life does not end once menopause arrives.
The ovarian activity ceases, but not the sexual activity. We are all sexed beings until death. The third thing is to normalise the menopause and its symptoms, knowing that also men experience hormonal changes with age, although in their case it is more gradual and less abrupt. And last but not least, there are countless studies that confirm that women’s sexuality gets better after midlife.
As in everything, we can focus on the empty or the full half of the glass. You have more experience, you know what you like, you lose the recurring fear of getting pregnant. The journey is just as important as the destination. The adolescent search for a faster orgasm does no longer exist. In any case, there are some small tricks that may help you with your sex life.
Lack of lubrication is a problem that may cause discomfort and even pain; these words do not match well with sex and can also kill your sex drive in one fell swoop. Nothing a good lube cannot fix. There are water-based lubes, silicone-based lubes, lubes which are tailored to the natural pH balance, which mimic your body’s own natural lubrication or which are enriched with aloe vera. The options are endless: you just have to find the one that best fits your body and your needs. But please, never miss the opportunity of having good sex because of lack of lubrication.
Prepare yourself for menopause
A strong vaginal musculature will be a great ally during menopause.
It is never late to start working out but try to do it as soon as possible. Get yourself a good set of vaginal balls of different weights and sizes and start your Kegel exercises.
What for? For preventing urinary incontinence, genital prolapse, and for increasing natural lubrication.
It is not bad, right?
Be the woman you want to be, with or without periods. But remember that sex is health and joy. It does not matter how old you are.